Bloke Test

Source: FHM Magazine - March 2001

Not since Cain smote Abel has there been such a contest between two siblings. Behold as the Lee boys go head-to-head in their own backyard...

Brett Lee Shane Lee
Could you change an air filter on a car? Not a chance. I'm a cricketer. I don't work for NRMA. No, I wouldn't have a clue. I've never even looked under the bonnet of a car.
Have you ever cleaned and gutted a fish? Yeah, absolutely. I love fishing, I can gut'em, clean'em, scale'em and I can eat'em. Yes, but I did a crap job. It was full of bones, I nearly killed everyone.
Do you cheat at family board games? I have been known to because Shane's the biggest cheat in the family so to beat him I had to join him. Always, especially when I play Monopoly. I always make sure I'm the one with access to all the money.
Would you stop a blue between two people you didn't know? No, I tend to run the other way - I'm a lover not a fighter. No, I don't even stop my own fights.
Have you ever headed a cricket ball? I've copped a few in the head. Courtney Walsh tried to knock my head off in Perth last year. What goes around... Never intentionaly but I headed a few facing the quicks in Pakistan in '99.
Would you feign sleep if a burglar was in your room? I'd either jump in the cupboard or pull out the Kookaburra bat and see what happens. No, I'd go straight for my one wood and work on my slice.
Do you towel dry your hair or use a hair dryer? Definitely a towel dryer or drip dryer. Honestly, I haven't used a hair dryer since I tried out mum's when I was 10. Towel dry, I won't use a hair dryer in any circumstance, any at all.
Ever lost your swimmers in the pool? Not as yet, I make sure I've got the very best elastic that money can buy. Yes, it was very embarrassing, but I also lost my shorts at the beach, and that was worse.
Have you ever chucked petrol on the barbie? Nah, I click it, light it and that's it. I don't think there's a need for pyrotechnics. My dad's got an electric so he'd probably kill me if I did.
Where do you stand in meat vs veg debate? I'll take both. I always eat all my vegies. I'm a good kid. Meat! I love meat! I'm afraid that I'm never going to be a vegetarian.
Final Score A lack of line and length from our fastest bowler leavesh him with a paltry two and a half. After a shaky start, Shane drives Brett through covers to score four - and claims glorious victory.